Alright, I’m admitting it, I want the cliché romance. I want the great teenage love story from all the movies. I want cheesy pick-up lines and first kisses that make you think everything is right in the world. I want hand holding and awkward dates that you laugh about later. I want to catch someone’s eye from across the room and feel an immediate spark.

I’m sick of what romance has become. I don’t want Snapchat streaks and a late night text message asking if I want to come over. I don’t want months of talking that leads to nothing or hooking up without any of the feelings. I don’t want to be in this weird limbo where I constantly have to question how we feel about each other. I don’t want endless conversations through messages only to never speak in person.

I am sick of finding people through Instagram messages and photos on screens. I want someone to see me on the train, or at work or at a party and have the guts to come up and talk to me. I want falling in love–I want someone who shares more than just what Netflix show they’re watching with me. I don’t want to be constantly questioning ‘what is this?’ or ‘what are we doing?’ I want to know that it’s me, and only me–not ten other people who are other back up options.

Look, I know the movies aren’t real. I’m not expecting Jake from Sixteen Candles to be waiting outside the church for me, or for someone to show up at my window holding a boombox. I’m not expecting to wait on a ferris wheel for my secret crush to reveal themselves while everyone cheers or for me and my best friend to fall madly in love with each other.

I’ve long accepted that the great romances and summer loves of the movies are not going to happen to me. But is it too much to ask for something real? To ask for the kind of romance that doesn’t rely on waiting the appropriate amount of time to reply to a text or wondering if you sent too many emojis?

I’m done with friends with benefits, casual hook ups and ‘just talking’–it’s time we started demanding more of the people who say they’re interested in us. Time to stop putting up with being a back-up option or someone to turn to when boredom hits.

We might not get the cliché high school romance but we deserve more than what we’re getting right now.