30 Jun 2021

If you’re out there on the other side of the barricade working hospo, retail or a plain ol’ desk job, a construction site can feel like a mysterious land full of strange characters and cultural traditions. The smoko, the tradies’ breakfast, the debates about tools, techniques and the condition of each other's boots are part of our great cultural tapestry, but we don’t all get to experience it.

If you’re curious about putting on the PPE as a blue-collar worker, or even a new-collar worker, we’ve set you up with a guide to some of the characters you’ll see out on site:

 

 

The Site Bro

You usually hear the Site Bro before you see them, as their smack talk manages to drown out all other conversation. Popular topics of conversation include talking about how huge their weekend was, giving opinions on other people’s work that they didn’t ask for, and blasting TikToks on break with no earbuds in. 

The Milk Crate Shit Talker

The Milkcrate Shit Talker probably used to be a Site Bro back in the day. A bit quieter now, what they lack in quantity is made up for in spades in quality. You may not hear a peep out of them, but if you’re caught out saying something stupid, they’ll be right in there with an absolute cracker of a call. Often heard telling people “You’re a good bloke mate - I don’t care what they all say ‘bout ya”. 

The Construction Manager

 

The Construction Manager’s a bit of a step up from the ground level, but at least they’re still wearing steel-capped boots and hi-vis. They’re just as likely to be schmoozing with the corporate suit in the demountable as they are to be rubbing shoulders with the subbies. They can be a bit of a pain, especially when the site’s gone way over budget and they’re looking for someone to point the finger at, but at the end of the day you’ve got to be at least a little thankful that they have to cop it from the suits instead of you.

The Corporate Suit

It’s hard to know what can be worse - a suit who looks down on you, or one that tries and fails horribly to relate to the work you’re doing out on site. If they’ve come out on site trying to blend in, all you’ve gotta do is take a look out for their unscuffed luxury boots to catch them out before you start complaining about the demands that the architect or engineer put there. There’s a time and a place for experimental building techniques, but it’s not when you’re months late on a deadline with a shoestring budget!


The Traffic Controller

Now this is the life! Sweet rates for twirling a stick around every few minutes or so? You’re sure there’s more to the job than that, but as far as you can tell once you put the cones out it’s more or less sorted, right? Historically working traffic meant you were some kind of traveller, usually working your way through those gnarly working visa requirements without having to pick fruit, but the pangolin’s curse has seen an uptick in some very bored looking Aussie residents taking up the ol’ lollipop.

 

The Workers' Comp Fiend

The Workers’ Comp Fiend has an unmatched eye for Work Health And Safety violations. The way they pull those rules out of the handbook you’d think they wrote the bloody thing. Light drizzle? Stop work. Someone puts their tools down in the wrong place? It’s like they go out of their way to trip over it and try and get the day off. If one of these characters is out on site, you can say goodbye to the idea of getting work done in any kind of reasonable timeframe.

 

The Apprentice

Bright-eyed, bushy-tailed, and, let’s face it, a little bit clueless as to the ways of the construction site. Catch these guys being sent to the hardware store to look for a long weight, a bucket of steam or some tartan paint, much to the amusement of everyone on site. Sure their kit is looking a bit squeaky clean, but with the right attitude they’ll be out there trading calls with the Bros and the Milk Crate Shit Talkers in no time.

 

For all the chat about getting you ready for the big wide world, there's so much stuff out there that you just don't get to learn about while you're in school - from personal finance to what it's actually like to work in construction in the 21st century. If you're feeling that way too, why not check out our Academies?