25 Feb 2020

Doing an apprenticeship is a great decision. We’ve talked about why a bunch of times, and it’s true. You’ll never regret doing one.

However, all new things take a bit of getting used to, and the first week of your apprenticeship will be no different. At least 90% of the following things will happen to you as pop your 'first week' cherry. Btw that’s not a real stat, but hey, it sounds good so let’s run with it.

 

You’ll finally understand the hype around a pie and choccy milk

I mean, any sane, functional member of society shouldn’t have to start an apprenticeship in order to realise just how great a good pie and a choccy milk really are. But if you really don’t get it yet, then having it for lunch every day for a week oughta set you straight.

Your sleep cycle will get a rude shock

Say goodbye to staying up until the early hours of tomorrow and say hello to waking up at 5am everyday.

I don’t know if anybody’s invented a word for ‘first-week jetlag’ yet, but I really hope it happens soon. Because if you were a bit of a night owl before your apprenticeship begun, your body clock is going to get a bit of a makeover in week one.

When you finish work, you finish work

No taking the laptop home in order to finish what you couldn’t get done in the office. No late-night study.

Once you clock off, the afternoon is yours. Get to the beach ASAP, hit up your mates, play some video games, cruise on your own and read a book, bake your parents a nice meal (see: pie and a choccy milk) – do whatever ya want.  

You’ll enter a relationship with the broomstick

One thing you might not have known about the construction industry – there is a whooooleee lotta sweeping to be done.

And nobody likes doing it.

And you’re the new person.

Get ready.

There will be pranks

If your boss asks you to fetch him a tool that you’ve never heard of in your life, there’s a good chance that it doesn’t exist.

And if all of your new workmates insist that it does indeed exist, there’s still a good chance that it doesn’t.

However, it’s probably better to trust them anyway and let the prank run its course. Otherwise, you run the risk of denying that it exists, only to find out that it actually does. Now you just seem kinda paranoid.

You experience the joys of working to music you like

Whether you’re blasting Triple J, Triple M, or one of the crew has their best pump-up Spotify playlist cranking, you’ll never listen to better music in another job.

And when times get busy, there’s nothing more uplifting than some epic tunes to help you get through to the afternoon. Make sure to come with some crowd pleasers, though – you might get handed the DJ role in your first week, which can be a very high-pressure situation.

At least one body part will break

You’ll wake up one morning and one body part will be stiffer than it ever has been before. No, you sickos, I’m talking about your back, or your legs, or your strongest sweeping arm.

You’ll learn to appreciate a good morning and arvo stretch more than anything in the world (except maybe smashing a certain savoury pastry for lunch and washing it down with your favourite choccy-flavoured dairy drink)

You will suddenly drink coffee

Did I mention how your body clock might not love the sudden shift to 5am starts? Well, one thing your body will love is a bit of coffee to help it adjust.

Coffee can be an acquired taste for some, and this is one of the best opportunities you’ll ever have to acquire it. Especially because you’ll probs be doing the coffee runs for a while yet.

Liking coffee also comes in super handy when you do a trade, because:

Smoko has never looked so good

How good is taking a sneaky ten-minute break just to sit around on your phone and scroll through Tik Tok, talk nonsense with your workmates, smash a coffee and try your hardest to turn ten minutes into twenty?

Saying ‘smoko?!’ to a tradie can be like saying ‘walkies?!’ to a dog – expect a very enthusiastic response.

The first week of your apprenticeship will likely be filled with ups, downs, laughs, and a few adjustments by the old body clock. You’ll also make a bunch of new mates you’ll likely keep for the rest of your life.

And later down the track, when the new apprentice arrives, you’ll know exactly what pranks to pull on him, and what coffee order to give him.