Which Stage of Dating Are You In?

Found someone ya like?

Does the very thought of their name send your lips twitching uncontrollably into the undeniable shape of a smile?

Or maybe someone else has found somebody they like and that somebody is you. But you aren’t so sure the feelings are reciprocated and the very thought of their name sends your lips twitching uncontrollably into a zig-zaggy, puzzled expression as you shrug your shoulders.

Love ain’t easy (despite what Rex Orange County has to say) and there are many different types of love out there.

Chances are, you’re all tangled up in some sweet, adorable, heart-melting, confusing, stressful, disgusting, miscommunicated lovey mess at this very moment, trying to wrap your head around it all. Good luck to you, my friend.

Shell-walking

You’ve just met. Probs on an online dating app (or maybe you’re seeing them in person - like how your great grandparents used to do it).

You’re treading on eggshells, trying to suss out whether you like each other. Trying to project all of your best qualities without having to bring them up directly, whilst keeping a sneaky eye out for any of their hidden worst qualities.

You’re not sure how they’d react to your politically incorrect sense of humour and they’re not sure how you’d react if they asked for your star sign. It’s a confusing time for everyone.

The 'what are we tho'

You’ve gotten to know them, and you like what you see. They’re all you can think about.

It’s too late now, you’ve caught the feels.

This is also the awkward stage where you don’t know what to call them. You can’t say boyfriend or girlfriend yet, but “the guy/girl I’m seeing” is an awfully long title to say every time you talk about them – and you talk about them a lot.

Don’t even dream of referring to them as your friend.

The awkward goodbye (or lack thereof)

You’re not vibing it.

But they are really digging you.

What a terrible situation. It’s also a terribly common situation, and there’s no one-size-fits-all method for dealing with it.

Some of your worst, more cowardly options include ghosting, benching, and breadcrumbing, then after that, haunting and zombieing (look them up). Be a good person and call things off the right way. Let them know that you’re not into it and that you want things to end (I believe it’s called Caspering).

Official

Did you make it Facebook official? Were they featured on your Insta story? Do you send Snapchats every day? Did you make a cute TikTok together?

If none of those things happened are you really an item?

The honeymoon

Aaaah, the glorious honeymoon stage. If this one could go on forever, there would be a lot of very happy people out there. But you’d also never see a bunch of your friends ever again.

When you’re in the honeymoon stage, it’s like you’re wearing a pair of sunnies with pictures of your partner superglued onto the inside lens. Everything you see, every decision you make and every spare moment you have to think is somehow related to them.

You start irrationally rearranging your timetable in order to maximize your time spent together. You ditch fun activities with your mates in order to do nothing with your partner instead. You kind of suck to be around.

It’s okay, we’ve all done it.

Decision time

Once the honeymoon is over, you can finally take a step back and take an honest look at yourself and your relationship. This could occur as long as 18 months after you started dating, and you’d be shocked by what you and your partner find out about each other after the fog has lifted.

The post-honeymoon stage is the real make-or-break moment for many relationships and moments of uncertainty or hesitation are normal. Just don’t jump to any rash decisions at your first feelings of doubt.  

Reflection

Unless you marry your childhood sweetheart, you’re gonna go through a lot of reflection after the end of every relationship.

Whether you’re the heartbreaker or the broken-hearted, you’ll find that you learn heaps from every relationship you have and you can bring these lessons with you onto the next round of the carousel of love.

Good luck out there, you adorable, persistent, romantic, repulsive seekers of that ghastly thing they call love.